Hiatus Explanation - Warning: TMI !!!!

Don't worry, I still have far too many pictures to post from our family vacation, but had to take a little break because I've been down for the count this week. Let me explain, but oh, where to start?!...
I dislike being sick. Not that anyone likes being sick; but I really don't like it. It brings out the wimp in me; not the strong, can-handle-anything-like qualities that it should in a woman. And as most of us know I'm not exactly married to the most sensitive, gentle, sympathetic creature there ever was. And its taken years for PJ and I to put this together and have discussions about it - but he makes me an even bigger wimp when I'm sick - because he doesn't appear to care and he thinks I'm strong enough to handle it, so I whine and complain even more than I wanted to before to get his attentions and hope for a little sympathy. But it doesn't work. And just makes me more miserable. So we both dread me getting sick ;)
Now, flashing back, about a week and a half before our scheduled family vacation I got a very awful sore throat. Now I already stated I don't like being sick and for me, some of the worst kind of sick, means having a sore throat. And it honestly was pretty bad, even round the clock Ibuprofen and Tylenol barely took the edge off of it. And I had it for about a week and thankfully got over it within days of our departure. What was even better was that nobody else got it and we went on our happily ever after vacation with everyone in tact.
We left CA on Saturday, February 26th to head home. It was a long travel day but slowly throughout the day I could feel my body getting achy and tired. Didn't seem unusual considering the fun but exhausting week we had just had and how it was all coming to an end. And then I started to notice that the tiredness didn't wear off and my neck was getting sore and I was getting swollen lymphnodes. Now this was ok with me because it was my neck, not my throat. But rather quickly the left side of my neck got pretty bad/big. It was painful to touch and not comfortable to move my head around but I was told by my husband and a couple of his co-workers that I must have a pretty nasty virus and so of course there was nothing to do but tough it out. So I did. Fairly well. For over a week.
Then the following Sunday night I didn't sleep so well. Thought I could feel my throat start to hurt. But the kids had school off Monday and we had a busy day so we got up, headed to the Y, then straight for a playdate at McDonalds and then they were off to a friends house to play while I ran a few errands. And within hours Monday afternoon (March 7th) while running errands I hit a downward spiral. Of course PJ was on a 10 hour shift at the Clinic which led directly into a 12 hour overnight OB shift at the hospital (gotta love what they make them do!). So when I texted him that I was almost in tears in the middle of Hobby Lobby and would like some Morphine please, he called to ask me what was up but I had already began to lose my voice and the pain was pretty intense and I couldn't communicate effectively what was going on with me. So he told me to make an appointment to be seen. I didn't exactly listen right away and went to pick up the kids. My sweet friend noticed the difference in me right away from a few hours earlier and insisted on keeping the kids until after dinner. I went home to rest. And then that night was awful and by the next morning this....
Led to this...
I had a doctors appointment first thing Tuesday morning. Dr. Josh noticed, as PJ had, that the the huge lymphnodes on my left side were a little unusual because they were really hard and unmoveable, not squishy like they should have been. But what bothered me was that neither he, or PJ, could see what I thought should be extreme swelling in my throat that was causing me to not be able to swallow very well or talk normal. They said it looked a little red and puffy but nothing notable. I was confused cause I was sure I could feel something. But he opted to send me for bloodwork and even a CT scan of my neck so we could checkout the 'impressive' lymphnodes to see the extent of their problem. Now this may seem like quite the work up for a sore throat but I was comforted by the fact that he was covering his bases. He also asked if I needed any pain meds. I was trying to be brave and said no, I'd be fine. But that was silly and I was texting him by the afternoon asking to renig on that comment. Anyway... The results came back and the radiologist noticed and commented on the obviously enlarged lymphnodes but didn't care to linger on that subject (other than noting it was causing a high degree of narrowing of my jugular vein?!). But what he found that was more comment worthy was a mass in my throat that was obscuring this and narrowing that. Would it sound wierd if I said I was thankful?!... I was just glad I wasn't crazy and something really was going on... just a little further down then either of my Dr's could see on their own. The report said it could represent inflammatory change. But also said that it could be a definite possibility of neoplastic mass (aka cancer)... Which meant Dr. Josh made some calls and convinced an ENT in St. Louis to double book his appointments to get me in next Thursday for a look and possible biopsy. I was then given a prescription for antibiotic and pain medication... which I didn't receive til the next day due to my own mistake of just wanting PJ to pick them on his way home from his overnight shift in the morning.
So this... Led to this...
Because over that same day and then night the swelling, inflammation, mass, whatever you want to call it seemed to grow. I couldn't talk. I couldn't swallow; even to choke water down was an undertaking for me. At one point around 3am Wednesday morning I even got my Ibuprofen stuck in my throat. So when my mom called to check on me bright and early Wednesday morning, she heard me crying and squeeking and she promptly informed me she would be leaving to drive over. And she got there that afternoon to take care of everything. Now PJ got home not long after I got off the phone with my mom, and my dear sweet friend Lis had came and grabbed my kids, and I had spent a few awful moments throwing up mucus. So I wasn't breathing incredibly well when he walked in the door... so then I got put on a steroid to help. And it did. Over the past few days things have been clearing up. But I've been told I still have to go see the ENT :{
So not a fun week. Actually it was an awful week to be sick. I had to cancel a RS Presidency meeting, cancel an Enrichment board meeting that we really needed to have for our big activity next week, cancel on two different days where I was suppose to be babysitting for friends that were counting on me, reschedule a friends birthday dinner that was suppose to be at my house... need I keep going??!?
But its true, there must needs be opposition in all things. And a yucky week taught me how much I am loved and cared for. It was amazing to have a friend who could tell me she was coming to get my kids for the day and I didn't have to worry about them at all. It tells you how much I use and abuse her when she already knew exactly when Tyler needed to eat lunch in order to be in front of my house for him to catch his bus at the right time; and that Dylan went down for a nap right after that; and that Kate drinks 6oz bottles; and that Brynn gets off the bus at 3 and Tyler not til 3:30. Once again, need I keep going?! THANK YOU LIS!!! It was comforting to know that I had a mom that would drop everything and come take over my household without me having to ask her. The kids were in heaven that Gramma came to visit and they had the best time with her and her amazing 'jet' making skills (aka paper airplanes). It was sweet to get the calls and texts and emails of other friends wondering about the kids or the meals or what our needs were. The simplest act of bringing me a smoothie touched my life! It kinda stunk to be the needy one. But it was inspiring to see and feel my blessings all around me. Now PJ is embarrassed about how long this post is on my sore throat. So I'll stop. But I really am a lucky girl...